You all did such a good job with the baby name suggestions, that I’m hoping you will be as helpful with grandparent names.

Here’s why:

My dad recently announced he wants the baby to call him “The Boss” or perhaps simply, “Boss”.  While the baby won’t be talking anytime soon, we need to squash this idea STAT.  I can’t listen to my father refer to himself in the third person as “Boss” any longer.

First of all, “The Boss” conjures up images of either Bruce Springsteen or a mobster, both of which are too cool to be associated with my dad. (No offense, Dad.)  Second of all, calling her grandfather “Boss” might create some confusing authority issues for my daughter.  It needs to be made clear early on that I am the one and only true boss in the family.

This is not my dad.

So “The Boss” is out, even if my dad hasn’t accepted it yet.  We must find a suitable replacement, and unfortunately, “Grandpa” isn’t going to work either.  Sure, my dad went gray – excuse me, silver – in his early-30s, but other than that, he’s just not a “Grandpa”.  When I think of “Grandpa”, I think of a short, somewhat crotchety old man with hearing aids that are never turned on and who lets his grandchildren cheat at board games and secretly gives them candy.  (Yes, I just described my grandfather).

My dad doesn’t need to turn off hearing aids to ignore me – he just tunes me out automatically.  Growing up he never let me win at anything, and would actually gloat when he beat me in games.  And he’s only shrunk a little, as far as I can tell.  See?  Not “Grandpa” material.

As for my mom, “Grandma” doesn’t work either.  While thankfully she hasn’t claimed any dictatorial titles like my dad, she is at a loss at what to be called.  The fact that she will ask me the same question four times within 20 minutes does lend her an air of senility, and yes, she does favor orthopedic shoes, but generally she is too young and chic to be “Grandma”.  I mean, she recently got asked to teach a weight lifting class – did your grandma lift weights and do spin several times a week?  Mine certainly didn’t.  My mom also doesn’t own a housecoat, another defining “Grandma” characteristic in my book.  She much prefers David Meister to mu mus.

My grandparents were “Mana” and “Baba”.  I have no idea where either of those names originated from – probably just baby babble that stuck.  My baby might very well choose her own names for her grandparents, but I need backup just in case she doesn’t.  Can’t risk “The Boss” becoming permanent.

That’s where I turn to you.  What did you call your grandparents?  Have you heard any names suitable for a younger, not-quite-hip-but-not-quite-traditional grandparent?  Please share!