Holy Cannoli! In a week we’ll have moved to Japan. Well, we’ll have arrived in Japan. The “move” part won’t quite be completed, given that most of our household goods are maybe/maybe not on a boat in the middle of the ocean with no expected arrival date (that we know of) and we will likely be living in a hotel till mid-May. This is when it would be really great to be a “go with the flow” kinda gal. But let’s face it, that’s just not me.
I hate moving. Like, really, really hate it. Like, loathe it with every fiber of my being. In the past five years – be it across town, across state, across country, and now, across the world – I’ve moved seven-and-a-half times. Seven. Make it stop! (I’ll explain the half another time.) Let me be clear, I never hate that we are moving or where we are moving to. In fact, moving so frequently – though tiresome – has offered amazing opportunities to meet new people and experience new things. I am beyond excited about the adventure that awaits us in Japan. It’s just the physical act itself that is so profoundly awful.
And guess what, moving with a baby sucks even more than normal moving. And moving internationally with a baby sucks the most. One of our moves, from California to Washington, D.C., my husband (then-fiance) thought it would be a good idea to move ourselves. Fun, even. An adventure! So we loaded up a U-Haul and spent the longest week of my life driving across country. Somehow we remained engaged. Luckily, you can’t drive to Japan, or else Damon would probably have suggested we do so. In fact, my saving grace during this last month has been that the Navy has done all the heavy lifting, allowing me to avoid a complete nervous breakdown. (Versus the semi nervous breakdown that I did have.)
An international move with the Navy breaks down like this: You have an express shipment for all the really important stuff you want to get to your destination first. Then you have a temporary storage move for all the things you are going to, well, temporarily store in the United States during your time stationed abroad. Then you have a household goods move for everything else.
Our express shipment was scheduled for mid-March. We don’t leave for Japan till end of April. That’s about a month-and-a-half of living without our most crucial household items. Okay. If it were just Damon and me, no biggie. I can rough it with paper plates and old linens for a few weeks if I need to. But it’s not just Damon and me. It’s Damon and me and Baby. Baby who loves her swing. Baby who adores her play mat. Baby who is just starting to use her Bumbo. These are clearly the most crucial household items. Dilemma: ship these with the express shipment and do without till we arrive in Japan or use them for a few more weeks until our household goods move and risk not seeing them in Japan till who-knows-when. It was a lose-lose situation. Damon and I discussed the pros and cons of this momentous decision ad nauseam until ruefully deciding on the former option. Watching the movers pack up that swing was heart wrenching. Then the playmat. Oh! It was too painful! Poor Elisabeth’s world was turned upside down that day, a confused little baby watching strange men take away her most beloved treasures, everything that brought her joy in the world. And her mother just letting them get away with it! I don’t know that she’ll ever forgive me.
To make things really complicated, I left for Italy the day after the express shipment move. To make things even more complicated than that, I scheduled the temporary storage move for the morning after I arrived home from Italy. It was, unfortunately, the only time available in order to complete our move-out, apartment cleaning, carpet cleaning and final inspection by the end of March. It was also, unfortunately, really, really stupid of me. To make things somehow even more complicated, we were flying to California for almost three weeks before flying to Japan. Basically, days before leaving for an international vacation with Elisabeth, Damon and I had to sort our life into the three different move shipments, Italian vacay items and Norfolk-to-California-to-Japan items.
As someone who lives her life in what I like to call “organized chaos” (my husband prefers the term “messy”, but what does he know?), this posed a bit of a challenge. Because while “organized chaos” works for me on a day-to-day basis, it does not work for me on a move. I insist on making that “organized chaos” just “organized”. Which means I sort through every drawer, every closet, every piece of paper and try to put everything in its place just so it will be perfect for the movers. I realize this is completely insane. My theory is that by doing this, the unpacking process will go smoothly and our house will be put into immediate order. It never, ever works out this way. Instead I end up sitting in a pile of old papers, crying into a mountain of giveaway clothes. Screw this all! Let the movers handle it and I’ll deal with it when we unpack! Anyone relate to that?
Somehow, I survived this and retained (most of) my sanity. Even without the swing to entertain Elisabeth while we juggled the three different shipments! We flew to California with 11 – yes, 11 – suitcases and a Pack N Play. In our time here, Damon and I have managed to whittle that down because let’s face it, traveling with 11 suitcases is ridiculous. And not allowed on most airlines.
While in the midst of all this packing pandemonium, my dad commented, “You military wives are remarkable”.
“No no no,” I corrected him. “The ones that do this without complaining are remarkable. I’m TOTALLY bitching about this.”
Those military wives truly are remarkable. In my short time as a Navy spouse, I’ve seen countless women uproot their lives, pack up their homes, and say goodbye to friends with positivity and grace. I’m still working on the grace part. Perhaps next move – once my stress-induced hair loss has stopped – I’ll be less of a total basket-case. One can hope!
Hi Diana! I can’t believe you are moving to Japan so soon! I had great plans to see Elisabeth before you left, but looks like that is NOT going to happen 🙁 I enjoy the photos Betsy sends. She is truly an adorable babe! Have fun in Japan and hurry home! I’ve really enjoyed your posts and hope you will keep it up. You are a fun and entertaining writer. Just keep taking deep breaths 🙂 Love you! Jill